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[fessus]

— NOCTIS LUCIS CAELUM

USERNAME
DARKNIGHT

DIVISION SUPPORT
EDICT TARNISHED AZ-MEHET

Comments

[coherer]

( A breath he was consciously holding to keep him steady is exhaled all at once. An explosive sigh of mild relief.

Finally. )

Thanks
Thank you
We can both say it, and I won't like ever forget
Like only having to do it once ever
Then every other time after we can say see you later and stuff
I feel like this is good
Right?
It's the best way of doing it
ykwim

[fessus]

It's okay

[ He repeats it again, as if maybe he can will a tone he means to comfort to come through in his texts. In Jonas's he hears his anxiety, the way he speaks choppily when he's tense to avoid silence. He'd done it the other night too. ]

We'll say it so it's said, and if we wanna say it again later we can. You don't have to make a promise either way

Deal?

[coherer]

Yeah deal
That sounds good thanks man

Are you doing okay?
Like with everything going on
I just feel like we didn't talk after we were failing miserably at stargazing

[fessus]

Np Jonas

Idk things were going pretty well until that convo last night. Ig most of it wasn't a wash tho, I got to learn about your drunken parties

And Cain's holiday arena or w/e

[coherer]

Lol yeah what was with that
Dick measuring contests apparently

We didn't get to hear about yours too much
Like did you celebrate year end holidays or stuff like Christmas?

[fessus]

Tell me about it

And it wasn't the right audience for it. Hard to talk about that w/o saying where I was at the time

[ The Citadel. A palace, more or less, and one Cain doesn't know about. There are some easy obvious truths to be inferred – Jonas isn't the only one with truths unsaid to other members of their group. ]

I learned about Christmas through the records here, we don't have it. The new year is a big deal tho. Fancy parties, usually at the Citadel or a hotel or smth. This year was better even with the fuck up

[coherer]

( Noctis and Cain might be getting along better, but there's still distance. He can't blame them, not when the better parts of their entire lives haven't been shared.

It's how it's supposed to go. Drip-feed friends information and they won't spook and run off. )

I think so too
Though I'm trying really hard to picture you in a tux now
Sorry bout it

tbh I think you'd look better in one of those fishing hats with hooks and crap hanging off them
In a tackle vest yk?
And you stand there like such a dad with your hands on your hips like
"Ahhh the fish'll be biting today yes siree"
Or like "I'll rustle us up some grub" lol

[fessus]

Wow. A tux, are you srs?

Like with a cummerbund and bowtie? Lol not in a million years, I think you're forgetting that I actually have really good taste and it's getting you confused

So how about you invent another doppelganger for me like you did when we met and he can wear the shitty outfits while I just take the tackles and extra fishing line

[ Yeah, that's right. He still hasn't forgotten about that strange chapter in their history. ]

[coherer]

( cheers up slightly at the word "cummerbund"

wipes his eyes, sitting up a bit straighter )

Don't even go there that was so creepy
Besides I really like the mental imagine of YOU wearing a cummerbund
Lol
😌

Hey when we can, we should go
Fishing the second we're not surrounded by a bunch of crappy sand
That's how we can celebrate new years
Set your standards bar high for all future new years

[fessus]

Creepier for me than it was for you, he kept looking at me

[ With softer features, fluffier hair, and more luminous eyes. Uncanny......

The offer stops his teasing, however, head tilting as he considers it. ]

Fr? You wanna fish with me

You

After all you said about it

[coherer]

( that was the little angel who saved my life... )

I was teasing you nerd lmao
Yeah I wanna fish with you
We can cook it after😛

[fessus]

[ He smiles, small but unsuppressible. ]

Okay

Then we say our goodbyes, sit together, and fish.

Deal?

1/2

[coherer]

( It sounds a little like what he might expect Heaven to be. )

Okay

2/2

[coherer]

Hey
We never did stargaze really
We kind of got distracted

That can be the night portion?
For real this time

[fessus]

[ It sounds like a bad idea. He's managed to successfully ignore the voices in his head – Cor, Gladio, Ignis – who remind him of his entanglements here and their weight back home. Being Jonas's friend is acceptable. Being whatever he felt he was with him under a blanket of stars, vulnerable, united, a picture without borders... isn't. That person could make mistakes.

How does he reconcile the two? ]

You sure?

Last time I thought you were gonna freeze to death

[ calmly projects... ]

[coherer]

( ... Looks away for a moment, wondering if the feeling will go away when he disconnects himself from their messages.

It doesn't. )

Goodbyes, fishing, stargazing
I'm sure

You don't have to lmk now if you want time to think about it

[fessus]

Why would I need time? Maybe I'm just trying to avoid the complaints I'll get when you wake up sick

Though who knows

If it's somewhere that actually has fish maybe it'll be warmer. More stars

[coherer]

Lol yeah yeah
Good theory though
I think we're heading out on the road soonish?
Maybe we'll finally get to find out where we're going, then we can get a better idea if there's literally anything of note on this planet AT ALL

[fessus]

There's glass

[ His pithiest joke yet. ]

Hey

You okay?

[coherer]

( ...

Smiles a bit, eyes softening. )

Not really tbh
Are you?

[fessus]

[ The words "of course" are typed before he can stop himself, but what he can keep himself from doing is hitting send. He stares at them, questioning himself with a slow deletion of each letter. ]

I don't know. Long term and short term are pretty different

Has he responded to you? It's not that, right

[coherer]

It's not him, we're talking rn

Talk to me
Tell me about the short term

[fessus]

Okay

[ Then all he has to do with that is to trust both of them. And he finds, shockingly, that he does. ]

Short term is better

But last night threw me off ig. Not you, me

And sometimes the convos with all three of us are harder

[coherer]

You mean letting Cain in on some of my info?
yk we can dissolve the group chat if you guys want
We all really tried, so if it's not working, you shouldn't feel pressured either way

idk if you want to hear a solution rn though or if you want to just get it off your chest
Tell me to shut it if you wanna vent

[fessus]

Nah that's not what I'm saying

The gc's cool, seriously forget that part. I'll just actually reread my texts before I send them next time 👍

I told you short terms better. Getting out of this camp and doing anything else will help