[ That torrent of messages, Jonas snapping at him, immediately sends his own frustrations to a ten. Numerous words are typed, all deleted, before he stands and commits himself to a steady pace around his tent. It doesn't help; the ball of tension and sense of injustice stays lodged in his chest, words repeating over and over in his mind. Would this be easier if he could see him?
Then he could grab his hand, at least, and care for Jonas would overwhelm his anger enough that he wouldn't give into the urge to just squeeze it until he stopped saying things to make him more defensive. Fuck.
He doesn't want this. Neither of them want this. Why are they doing this? What the fuck was so bad about sending a few nicknames, something they did in their group chat together? He doesn't say anything to Jonas as he suddenly returns to his phone, hurriedly looking up that thread with Cain to search it for what Jonas sees. There's jokes, there's affection, there's chemistry. Nothing blatant like the drinks and dinner between Cain and Jonas. But everything else. Subtext. He's scrubbing for details like he's on trial and this is evidence instead of being willing to grasp what the larger issue is here. ]
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Then he could grab his hand, at least, and care for Jonas would overwhelm his anger enough that he wouldn't give into the urge to just squeeze it until he stopped saying things to make him more defensive. Fuck.
He doesn't want this. Neither of them want this. Why are they doing this? What the fuck was so bad about sending a few nicknames, something they did in their group chat together? He doesn't say anything to Jonas as he suddenly returns to his phone, hurriedly looking up that thread with Cain to search it for what Jonas sees. There's jokes, there's affection, there's chemistry. Nothing blatant like the drinks and dinner between Cain and Jonas. But everything else. Subtext. He's scrubbing for details like he's on trial and this is evidence instead of being willing to grasp what the larger issue is here. ]